If I've ever done something or thought something crazy - its usually just because I care. There are so many people, so many possibilities, and so many reasons not to entertain the idea, yet I can't help it because it sounds like a good thought. There are times I feel it'd be perfect, make sense... and other times where I think to myself, "would it even work though?" but if it makes sense - wouldn't that mean it'd work itself out? It's hard to let things go - it's hard to allow someone else control things that sometimes put themselves right in front of me. Is it God putting these opportunities in front of me or is it the devil putting false hope in my face? It's hard to distinguish and it's harder to resist. I'm finding that the more I screw up, the longer it's going to take until I get what I'm supposed to have. Will I stop fighting and surrender? or will I continue trying out my own options?

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I sometimes find myself settling for happiness as opposed to waiting for complete contentment. Settling is sometimes natural, sometimes expected, and even sometimes something you have to do in order to reach a greater prize. But do I have to constantly settle over and over. Perhaps, I've mistaken settling for content. perhaps I've become content in settling. So, here's to pressing on.

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