Driving down the back roads only traveling 30 miles an hour. Enjoying the cool evening, hearing the creatures of the night. I couldn't help but reflect.
It'd been long, tiring, draining day. I was forced to prioritize, forced to reevaluate, and forced to be transparent. I realized something about myself in the midst of all of it. I'm not as strong as I thought. I'm also not as extroverted as I thought. I would prefer to live a life in exclusion. I would rather keep to myself, stay in, just do what I need to do to get by. Unfortunately, that's not what being a christian is about, that's not what being a disciple is about.
I'm trying. I'm pushing myself. I'm really trying to learn and grow in Christ to be who I'm meant to be.

I don't know what I'm trying to say. Maybe that's all I needed to say.
But I do know that I need my best friend with me. He can't be here right now, which hurts a little. But I know he would be if he could. It just sucks when the people closest to you can't be so close when you need them most.